A fellow Chelsea Greener has emailed me the following flash of genius.
In honor of the JP Morgan/Bear Stearns bailout I suggest that we couch impeachment in similar terms; since money is the true master of the United States Congress this proposal has as good a chance of succeeding as anything currently on or off the table.
We the people of the United States of America, recognizing the bankruptcy of the current administration of Bush Cheney, authorize payment in an amount not to exceed $30 billion dollars from the United States Treasury via The Federal Reserve, to be provided to the members of the United States Congress, in order to induce Congress to assume the liabilities and assets of Bush Cheney and remove Bush Cheney from the White House, effective immediately.
To which I replied
You might be giving them too much money, though. What always shocks me is just how damn cheap the politicos are. It seems that you can buy the vote of a Senator for a mere $5,000 to their reelection campaign. It’s like the world’s super power is run by a bunch of crack whores. (No disrespect intended to crack whores, who, Lord knows, make a more honest living than half of Congress.)
This all also reminds me of something I heard about the Vietnam War—that for all the money the US spent (in direct expenditures, mind you, not including any of the interest on debt stuff) we could have had an in-ground swimming pool built for every Vietnamese family. For the blog I should probably do a similar calculation for Iraq.* If we’d promised a cash payment to every man, woman, and child in Iraq of, say, $5,000 once Hussein was overthrown and five years of functioning democracy had taken place (with maybe $1,000 paid upon the overthrow), don’t you think we’d be sitting pretty?
* Stay tuned.
[UPDATE: tune in here.]